Tazmanian Devil Syndrome

Do you know anyone with TDS (Tazmanian Devil Syndrome)?

This disorder is characterized by:

Voracious appetites for food, power, sex and money

Prone to manic outbursts and hyperactivity

Poor impulse control

Strange cravings for rabbit meat

Extreme body gyrations and gesticulations when aggravated

Frequent, loud, unintelligible vocalizations

Ability to destroy a hotel room in seconds

Many Rock Stars, talk show hosts, and politicians suffer from this affliction. A transient form of this condition can often be seen in male teenagers. Contact your local TDS society or support group for more information, and please give generously by sending donations to the TDS National Foundation.



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Led Zeppelin?

This Band was reviled by many when they debuted. Rolling Stone Magazine panned their first Album. Parents cringed when their teenaged sons blew out the family Stereo with Ramble On.

No matter, their Disciples knew that genius was lurking behind the wild riffs and soaring Robert Plant vocals. Jimmy Page is the undisputed Champion of Acoustic/Rock guitar, creating techniques that have yet to be equalled.

Sadly, after a twelve year run up to 1980 or so it was all but over. They lost their beloved ground breaking Drummer John Bonham to Vodka poisoning in 1980, and essentially disbanded, except for a few sporadic performances since.

Their body of work is still relevant today, and music evolution since the Seventies has revealed the true genius behind their songs. 

Find and play a few Led Zeppelin tunes. It may open up your own creative soul beyond the music.

E-Cigarette Anyone?

1. a cigarette-shaped device containing a nicotine-based liquid that is vaporized and inhaled, used to simulate the experience of smoking tobacco.

"more smokers are turning to electronic cigarettes to help them quit smoking"

Whatever sporadic cigarette smoking that I've tried was done years ago, but when on Vacation, I admit to having the odd craving for a Camel, or some equally repugnant strong cigarette (one reason I should avoid Vegas!). This has led me to consider the whole E-cigarette fad, and whether that would be a good alternative to satisfy the occasional nicotine craving. The main component of these devices is electronically vaporized, liquid nicotine often combined with other chemicals or flavoring elements. Presumably there are fewer toxic chemicals in the vapor as compared to regular cigarettes, but the product is unregulated and has not been rigorously studied in terms of health outcomes. There's no second hand smoke, but second hand vapor may not be harmless either. It's hard to believe that there wouldn't be some adverse effect on the lungs by inhaling concentrated nicotine. Children may be at special risk, as nicotine may slow the growth of the adolescent brain.
So I suppose it's buyer beware at this point, and avoiding temptation seems like the best option - In Vegas or not.
Get more information on E-cigarettes at How Stuff Works: 10 facts about e-cigarettes.

Guest Author Invitation

Do you have an unpublished article or story kicking around? Perhaps a theme that doesn't quite fit your website? In an effort to encourage fellow authors Seasons Under The Sun would like to publish your story here.

The story can be on a topic of your choice, and you can include photos too. Of course you'll retain sole copyright to the article, and you're free to publish it on your own site as well. We won't censor any submissions, but will simply publish the first few reviewed stories that we like. This is a standing invitation to submit an article with no deadline. The stories will be published on the day of approval, and will link to your site. Each story will be on the main page as the most recent top post for at least two days, and will be permanently archived at this site as well unless you prefer otherwise. This should be a Win/Win proposition, and may have special appeal for novice bloggers trying to get established, or writers who may not have a website or blog to publish at. We look forward to reading your posts!

Please send your submissions by e-mail here: Let's hear from you!
You may also leave your article or story to be reviewed as a comment on this post if you prefer (the comment will remain as part of the post unless you would like it removed once the story has been reviewed).

Domestic Blunders

Our homes are sanctuaries that protect us from the harsh realities of life, but running a household is a complex undertaking. I'm proof that a supposedly capable person can make domestic gaffs that make Mr. Bean look like a genius. Even the brilliant Albert Einstein could be forgetful around the house, so what hope is there for the rest of us?

The "take home" lesson? Don't expend all your brain power at work - you need some for household duties too.

MY SHORT LIST OF MISADVENTURES AT HOME:

1. Tried to cook pancakes on a George Foreman Grill. You know - the one with the sloped surface.
   
   
2. Used regular liquid soap in an automatic dish washer. Try it if you want to see wet soap suds bubbling out of the dish washer all over your kitchen floor.
   
   
3. Activated the home security system for motion detection prior to a walk, but forgot about the house cat. Came back home to blaring alarms and a terribly traumatized tabby.
   
   
4. Locked myself out of the house on numerous occasions while tending to the yard. Good opportunity to learn meditation skills.
   
   
5. Forgot about a lit candle that was in a flammable, plastic holder (or was this my wife?). The candle holder caught on fire, but fortunately we were able to extinguish it right away.
   
   
6. A ladder slipped out from under me while I was trying to put Christmas lights on the eavestrough (This is a classic). Luckily, I was able to grab a part of the ladder while hanging onto the trough thus averting disaster. This is similar to a ladder scene involving Chevy Chase in the movie Christmas Vacation.
   
   
7. Forgot about some pita bread I was grilling in the oven - yes it caught on fire. The fire remained confined to the oven, but the oven door was permanently charred and discolored. Try explaining that one to the wife.
   
   
8. Tried to get rid of bags of dated pasta by throwing them in the garburator. This created a kind of starch super glue that completely clogged the garburator throughout every orifice (actually my wife did this).
   
   
9. Left a closed spray nozzle attached to a garden hose on in the spring. It burst after a few freeze/thaw cycles dumping thousand of gallons of water into the yard. Coincidentally our sump pump gave out and the basement flooded. Realized the outdoor faucet was still on days and dollars later.



I could describe various scientific theories about human error and why it occurs in different situations, but that isn't the point. All of us can be Dumb, Dumber, or Dumberer at times. I'm sure many readers can relate to their own silly gaffs at home. If you would like to come clean about any of your domestic blunders, then please tell us your story by leaving a comment below.

The Secret to Life (Encrypted)

"Ujh Oje Pa Rx Hwbx Rmqf"





"Ujh Oje Pa Not Rx Hwbx Rmqf"
Both encrypted sentences are paradoxical truths.
If you solve this cryptogram please leave your answer as a comment below!

The Pink Haired Goddess

This photo brings back memories of fun times in Vegas a few years ago. My wife and I were playing around with these crazy looking wigs in a novelty shop - right after doing a tacky wax museum tour. All of that seems like an alternate universe now - gambling too much, comped rooms and shows, arguments with pit bosses, and getting cheated by some black jack dealers. One highlight of those trips was seeing Tiger Woods in 96 playing the Las Vegas Invitational. On one hole, he hit a drive 350 yards that landed just off the fairway, and then expressed his displeasure with the shot by slamming his driver into the tee box turf. That was before all of the majors and millions of dollars, but he's still prone to the odd tantrum now and then. My Vegas visits are less frequent and more pedestrian now, but the curious should see Las Vegas at least once, despite all of the excess, spectacle, and debauchery on display there. You might get some insight into the dark side of human nature - yours and others, and meet a few quirky, but decent characters too. All a part of this whacky journey that we're on. "Bright light city gonna set my soul, gonna set my soul on fire."

Donut Mania

Is it possible that someone could grow up in North America never having tried a donut? Do you know anyone who hasn't eaten a donut?

I don't, but at the other extreme a man named John Haight ate 29 donuts in just over six minutes back in 1981 to claim the Guinness World Record for donut eating. It makes you wonder if he could have eaten the worlds largest donut. It was an American-style jelly donut made in Utica, New York on January 21, 1993 that weighed 1.7 tons and was 16 feet in diameter - if not the donut, maybe he could have finished the hole or the jelly? Here is a whimsical page with a dozen interesting facts about donuts.

Donuts are ingrained in North American popular culture with TV characters like Homer Simpson satirizing your typical donut lover. Police are often ridiculed for hanging out at donut shops a lot, but it's probably not a fair rap since they may be the only restaurants open on late night shifts, and of course in a parking lot most people will spot the cruiser. There's a Tim Horton's donut shop across the street from a hospital in our city that is swarmed by health care workers on evening and night shifts. You might predict that many romances between cops and nurses began over the odd jelly sprinkled donut. Legend has it that dunking donuts first caught on when actress Mae Murray accidentally dropped a donut into her coffee while dining at Lindy's Deli on Broadway in New York City.



How relevant are donuts to the economics of society? It's claimed that in the United States there are over 10 billion donuts made every year - somewhat amazing for a sugary product that has little or no nutritional value. Some economists claim that you can judge the health of the economy by looking at the size of the hole in a donut. The hole is smaller when times are good because more dough is used. Could the shape have some universal appeal as a symbol - a circle - an empty hole - complete - but incomplete all at the same time? It certainly is a numerical symbol as shown by the Donut Abacus, although the donuts are often plastic in that case. In terms of economics, I'd like to see the former Billionaires at Krispy Kreme weigh in here.

Santa Makeover

The present version of Santa hasn't been around all that long now, and he's really more of a commercial department store invention than a true icon. Santa seems to be less popular now than in years gone by - appearing in fewer commercials and TV shows etc. Let's face it he's becoming a dud, and is in sore need of a makeover!

First off, a new opening line would be in order since "HO HO HO" might be taken the wrong way in some circles. In these days of health awareness the extra weight should go - no more cookies and milk after a chimney run, and he needs a good exercise program. Perhaps he should start with a spa package in Alaska, then get the elves to build an exercise room next to the Reindeer stables? A spa visit that includes a beard trim, pedicure, manicure and hair coloring would be in order for a younger, more hip look. His suit is looking pretty gaudy too, and there are some eager and ready New York fashion designers hoping to craft Santa a new, updated costume. Heck, they could even add an invisibility cloak, so awakened little tots don't spot him in the house. Throw in a new hat, belt, and boots, and he'll be ready to fly. After the makeover, there'd be new corporate sponsorships on the horizon. If so, he'd need to get hooked up with a new P.R. firm, and be prepared to put a few logos on the new suit.

After all of this, he'll look pretty snazzy when he drops that lump of coal into Donald Trump's stocking.

Get your Speed out!

We just returned from Vegas. It was actually a relaxing vacation this time. Unlike prior past trips, I actually slept well. The key is to pace yourself. No all night gambling sessions, and not over doing the dining and drinking. We saw the Cirque du Soleil Beatles show "Love" at the Mirage and it's spectacular. The Strip always seemed to be packed with tourists, but it's easy to find alternate walking routes through the shops and casinos. The most exciting activity for me on this trip was a visit to Exotics Racing School at the Las Vegas Speedway where I drove five laps in a Ferrari 430 Scuderia accompanied by a professional driver who guides you through the track. This is a top notch facility that's run by courteous and safety conscious staff ensuring a fantastic experience. You can run the cars past 100 mph on the straightways, and the cornering is a blast. This is something I plan on doing again, as there are few opportunities for such an experience in my neck of the woods - short of buying a Ferrari myself. My wife and I had cooled to the idea of returning to Vegas again, but the City still has some pleasant surprises, with many more hotel and casino venues built since our last trip in 2003. My wife says the shopping in Vegas has improved a lot too, and the Visa statement will back her up on that one! Not too many Elvis sightings anymore, and you have to dig around to find a good Rat Pack show, but Vegas still shines for entertainment.
Tags Ferrari, Driving, Vegas, Cirque du Soleil

Road Raging

Are you a Road Rager?
Some disturbing aspects of driving that many of us overlook would be lethal or disabling accidents, pollution, and rampant burning of fossil fuels.  However, something that anyone who drives is likely to encounter regularly would be rude, selfish, and occasional psychotic behavior from other drivers. Unfortunately we may be as likely to dish out the rudeness while driving as we are to receive it. Obvious explanations for this rash behavior are often cited - such as the impersonal reality of commuting anonymously along side other strangers in their vehicles, and instinctive responses to perceived physical threats ( the *#$!!# idiot who just cut you off) etc. However, these explanations or excuses do not address the core problem with selfish, angry driving, and that is a basic lack of respect for your fellow humans on the road. Driving courteously, without getting angry, and respecting the rules of the road could be one of the greatest personal, and spiritual challenges that an individual could set for themselves. Instead of arriving at our driving destinations exhausted, frustrated, and angry we could finish our road trips refreshed in the knowledge that we did not react to other drivers' boorish behavior, and we may have actually put a smile on someone's face by letting them into our lane. It's likely that drivers could add years to their lives, and enjoy better health by staying calm and courteous in traffic. The road ragers are on a self destructive path that unfortunately may injure others as well. We can't control others, but we can be responsible for our own behavior, and since driving is often the most dangerous activity on our daily schedule why don't we start there? The idea of using a SORRY sign to appease a potential road rager doesn't appeal to me, but it may have some merit as well.

Here is an excellent discussion on dealing with stress and pressure in the vehicle.



Tags:
Road Rage, Driving