Saturday, June 17, 2006

How to Drain your Brain

  • Avoid getting sleep at all costs. Studies have shown that significant sleep deficit results in mental impairment similar to intoxication along with a decline in motor skills.
  • Eat a lot of junk food with high fat and sugar content, and avoid fruits, vegetables, fish, and other "brain" foods.
  • Never Exercise, otherwise you will experience the benefits of better blood flow to the brain along with improved Neuronal metabolism.
  • Don't try and learn a new skill or challenge yourself in anyway, or you might stimulate the growth of new neural connections.
  • Avoid difficult games, problems, and puzzles - that way your I.Q. will stay the same or decline over time.
  • Accept the status quo at work and in life to keep the creative side of your brain dormant.
  • Abuse drugs, alcohol, or other substances to keep your brain cells suppressed, and eventually damage them permanently.
  • Let your emotions run wild - especially anger. Such highly charged states are not conducive to good mental function.
  • Never look for more than one solution to a problem - that way you won't have to engage too many neurons in the task at hand.
  • If you follow this advice you will experience the down side of KISS (Keep It Simple Stupid) - something smart people say when they are over thinking a problem, except in your case you will actually be stupid and simple :-).

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